How are we harming children through gender stereotypes?

The debate regarding nature or nurture continues, but we now have a significant number of bread crumbs to follow to lead us to better decisions.  The first widely publicized case that many are familiar with, is the study by Dr. Money (not kidding) who published the tragic case of the Reimer twins. One of the boys had his penis accidently cut off during circumcision so he was raised as a girl, until he found out at age 14. Both twins eventually committed suicide; the doctor stated the experiment was a success and that a boy could be raised as a girl. This is where Gender neutrality theory, in which nature controls gender, began. A documentary published on BBC, 46 min. long, tells the tragic story with its horrible twists. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MUTcwqR4Q4Y . TLC has a 13 min. version: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXJN_zXcspM . This was the result of a surgical error, but biology often is not clear either, while there are differences in boys and girls as individuals, this may most likely be a combination of biological and social influences. A neurologist, Eliot, in Pink Brain, Blue Brain, describes the hormone wash that determines if a fetus will be born looking like a girl or boy. Eliot and other researchers have pointed out that in twin studies for example, there is no difference in behavior or cognition when born, even though they were exposed to the same hormones. She also points out that the biggest difference later in life is toy choice, something that is equal when they are young, but quickly differs by the time they are 3 years old. However, because we socially accept that girls can play with boy and girl toys but it is not ok for boys to play with girl toys, some girls don’t take long to find out they can play with everything. Why does it matter who plays with what? It matters for the same reason categorizing by gender matters, it creates a hierarchy of opportunity, limited the lower status. Dr. Eliot talks about these issues and mores, available in a number of YouTube videos, such as why girl’s toys and experiences limit spatial skill practice and later they score lower in math and engineering. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyMrUCFDQeU.   Children benefit from playing with boys and girls and learning from all different kinds of toys. We need to be careful of the messages, often hidden in a glance or a frown even, that we give boys and girls about what is acceptable. Staying neutral on toys gives them a wide variety of learning experiences and allows them to choose what they want to do and play with, influencing them when they are young and later in life.

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